Where there is love, there is also the risk of heartbreak, and you and your partner may discover you have no future together at some point. Even when this is obvious, terminating a relationship can be difficult, especially if you cohabitate. You probably have some powerful feelings for each other if you’ve come this far to move in together.
This could also appear to be a waste of time, as love and good respect cannot overcome all obstacles, and staying in an unfulfilling relationship would almost certainly make you unhappy in the long run. Although not all relationships succeed, knowing this may cause the breakup process more difficult. We’re here to assist you if you’re unsure where to start. So, if you want to know how to break up with someone you live with, keep on reading.
Can You Break Up And Still Live Together?
Breaking up is never simple, but staying together after you’ve decided to separate is much more difficult. Nothing happens after you’ve decided to separate because you’re still living together. Staying together could be made for various reasons. It might be challenging to tell your children that you and your partner have decided to separate if you have children together.
In an ideal scenario, when you are staying at the family home, you should tell your children about your choice to separate at the same time. You’re unlikely to address all of their queries, such as when you will sell the family home if you can stay there or what the future contact arrangements will be.
That’s because so much could hinge on the outcome of the financial situation. You may not want to set a definite schedule when it comes to contact because what is feasible will depend on where your spouse works and how accommodating his employers are to mid-week contact.
Living together post-breakup is a temporary solution but requires some serious planning and negotiation. Think of the situation as a house share and recognise that you’re no longer in a relationship with your ex, rather they are now your housemate.
– INDEPENDENT IndyLife
Why Is Letting Go So Hard?
Because of the memories you have, letting go can be difficult. You refuse to realize that the lovely bond you used to have is no longer there. You want to revive the past and rediscover what you once had. You’re afraid that even if you let go of this individual, everything you care about from your shared past will be lost.
The memories that used to bring you joy are now only bringing you anguish. Each recollection serves as a reminder that your relationship is over. You want to keep the person who keeps the past alive for you.
How To Break Up With Someone You Live With
Breaking up is difficult, especially when you’re doing it knowingly while still living under the same roof. Here’s how to get through it, according to experts.
- Have A Conversation
When you’ve decided to end your relationship, you must give yourself time and space to consider what you want to say before expressing it. The conversation will almost certainly be difficult because when you’re anxious, you lose access to your brain’s logical and analytical components. So, if you want to break up with someone you live with, have a direct chat with them.
- Be Clear And Kind
To avoid any misconceptions, begin by announcing your desire to end the relationship. Coming out and saying, “I’m breaking up with you,” can be frightening. However, indirect options such as “I don’t think things are working out” or “Perhaps we should break up” might lead to lengthy discussions with ambiguous outcomes. You may be steadfast in your intention to terminate things while they leave with the notion that they can still salvage the relationship.
- Choose A Low-Stress Time
While it’s preferable to discuss as soon as you make a decision, if they’re facing a huge deadline or another immediate cause of stress that requires their complete concentration, you might want to wait a day or two. Avoid having a conversation before bedtime or before work because you’ll need ample time to explain your feelings and hear theirs. Make sure your children are occupied and out of earshot if you have them.
- Stay Calm
They might become anxious, furious, or emotional. You can also go through some emotional trauma. You care about one another, and this will impact both of you. That doesn’t mean you have to put up with them screaming at you or any other form of outburst. When things get hot, try not to allow your emotions to take over.
Instead, get out of the room, get some water, or go for a walk around the block. If you’re terrified or feel endangered, call a buddy. If they appear too agitated to continue talking, offer that you pick up the subject later when they are more relaxed.
- Plan To Revisit Practical Matter
You’ll need to discuss financial issues like paying joint bills and dividing up items you bought together, such as electronics, appliances, and furniture. Even in the most amicable splits, going through cash and shared belongings could be lengthy. If you’re feeling stressed right now, set aside some time and go over these crucial points.
Things To Consider
When children are involved, breakups become considerably more difficult. Decide ahead of time what you’ll tell them. Prepare to answer inquiries regarding the separation and future arrangements by talking to the kids together.
Don’t forget about your dogs; they’re part of the family, too. Pets you bring are likely to stay with you, but what if you adopt a fur baby together? Consider establishing a co-ownership or visiting agreement so that you can also spend some time with your pet, as long as you’re not fleeing an abusive environment.
Comment below to share your thoughts and don’t miss our blog on improving spiritual health that can help one cope with emotional issues.